You know, I had pretty much given up hope on this little blog of my mine. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to write in here–I did. It was just that whenever I tried whatever I wrote came out sounding… I don’t know. Just not right. I’m a fiction writer. Everything I write is fictional, characters I create, lives I create. Okay, so most of what I have written is based on actual events, but even still, it’s been edited, sculpted, into something else and someone else. The truth is… you can’t edit real life. Well, I suppose you can, but then it’s no longer real, it becomes something else entirely. By the time you’ve finished, you’re in a completely place than where you started.
It was a friend of mine who has inspired me to try and start writing more. She keeps a fabulous little blog, and after reading it, I was so envious of her, that I was inspired to try and keep something simular. Way back when, she and I actually bonded over our own internet diaries. That diary has been long silenced, but the need to write hasn’t. And as much as writing out my emotions through the lives of my characters has been great, I have this sudden urge to be me. To write about me. No new characters, no editing. Just, I hope, the honest to god truth. Right now, things are about to change. I can feel it in the air, like before a storm. And I’ve never been more scared in my life–not knowing what is about to happen. So there is no time like the present to start anew. And, I hope, that sharing whatever the future may hold in this little, insignificant online journal, can help me figure out exactly what it is I’m searching for.
So here I am, at the beginning. And the beginning of the story has always been the hardest for me to write.