Beauty queen of only eighteen, she had some trouble with her self…

Yesterday was such a good today. And tonight–not so much.

To be honest, I’m not sure what has left me feeling like this. No, that’s a lie too. I know exactly why I’m feeling so blah. I think. It’s other people’s perspectives of me. I always thought that I came off as a nice person. I’m shy, sure, but apperently one persons shy is another persons evil death glare.

Ugh, I’m not even sure why I care so much about other people’s opinons of me, but they matter. And now I’m left feeling awful, like a horrible person, and downright wretched. All I wish is that Andrew was here instead of on the other side of the harbour. I should really just close my eyes, get some sleep, and not think so much about other people’s opinions. But all I can think about is “what if people think I’m a huge giant bitch”… and it’s bothering the hell out of me.

A secluded tropical island has never looked so ideal.


3 responses

  1. I know these feelings all too well. I care far too much about what people think of me; it’s disgusting how much I let it bother me. If I had some advice on how to get over it, I would tell you… but I’m still learning myself.

  2. Well thank you for the nice comment. I’m feeling better slightly–although I have a horrible head cold–but it still bothers me. Because I’m not an evil bitch so I don’t know why anyone would think that about me!

  3. I too, let other’s perceptions of me get in the way of my perception of myself. To be honest though I’ve found it’s one of those “damned if you do, damned if you don’t” kind of things. I am a bit shy myself and maybe even a little reserved at times, so sometimes people think I’m being stand offish and even bitchy. However, I’m also very outgoing, and it’s like sometimes being too nice or outgoing bites you in the ass as well. So, I say just try to let that stuff roll off of your back. Know you’re awesome and if you accept yourself, that’s all that matters. Hope you have a fabulous day.

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