you’ll be a dentist… you have a talent for causing things pain. son, be a dentist… people will pay you to be inhumane.

Today I faced one of my greatest fears. I went to the Dentist.

Now, I’m sure some people would probably think I was silly for freaking out about my check-up at the dentist. I’m sure these same people probably eat lots of candy, brush twice a day (maybe) and floss only when there is something stuck in their teeth. I am not one of those people. I brush twice a day (with special toothpaste!), use mouthwash, floss, and try my very best not touch anything with sugar (candy, pop, juice) and still I hate the dentist. But in all honestly,the dentist usually hates me too.

I actually was having a panic attack over the thought of having to go. The last year has not been good to me, and I know nutritionally wise, I haven’t been getting enough nutrients. I’ve been sick a lot, and my teeth have felt especially sensitive lately. So, automatically, I was assuming that when I went into that Dentist office, after they finished yelling at me, they would announce that they were being forced to pull out all my teeth. At the very least I foresaw a whole lot of work being done. I had a hard time sleeping last night and relaxing because all I could think about was what was going to happen. I even asked Andrew to come because I figured I would need someone to calm me down before I had to go to work. And there would be tears.

So off we went, me freaked out, Andrew telling me that everything would be fine.

It took a long time, and I had to wait around for my dentist I asked the Dental Hygienist a lot of questions because I want to know what I could do to take better care of my teeth. And I told her exactly what I thought—it was not going to be good and I did not feel good about being there. My sister was in getting a filling and I could hear the drill. Two things which make the dentist a horrible experience: the sound of the drill and the smell. Anyways, after a while I finally saw my dentist and gripping the edge of the chair prepared myself for the worst.

Okay, I guess the moral of the story is I should listen to my boyfriend. That or maybe mouthwash really is amazing but I’m sure that one is probably less true. Anyways: Yes, I have a cavity (one, behind my front teeth) but only one. One. The bad news is it looks like all my pain and sensitivity in my teeth is coming from the fact I  grand my teeth in my sleep and I’m going to have to get a special mouth plate made in order to stop this since it’s not good. But apparently something I’m doing is right because this was not the huge drama I thought it would be. And believe me, that is a relief. You have no idea how easy I was able to breathe when I found that out. It’s been a long time since I have walked out of a dentist office actually smiling.

So that is one greatest fear I can cross off the list. Well, this week at least.


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